Can't You See I Worry?
by The Forbidden Secrets
Summary: Roger is vicious and sadistic, but there is one thing he cares about, and that’s Jack. OneShot RogerJack


Fs: Written right after finishing the book, an inspired work. Set right after the death of Piggy. Enjoy.

Paring: Jack/Roger

Warnings: Slash

Disclaimer: I do not own Lord of the Flies.

Rating: Pg-13

Summary: Roger is vicious and sadistic, but there is one thing he cares about, and that's Jack. One-Shot Roger/Jack

Title: Can't you see I worry?

"Talking"

'Thoughts'

Jack suddenly sat up; his breath coming out in uneven huffs and his normally collected eyes wide in fear. Slowly he regained control of his panicked body as he tried desperately to shake the vivid images of the nightmare away. He had seen Simon again, that one odd boy with his continuous fainting spells and eyes glossed over in quiet thought. The nightmare had called back images of his contemplative eyes wide in pain and his mouth stretched out in a blood-curdling scream as they repetitively impaled him with the sticks they sadly passed as spears. Images of Piggy's smashed in skull caused his stomach to lurch unpleasantly.

He slowly stood up and gazed at the slumbering boys surrounding him. Their once innocent faces hidden by the harsh paint of rage and hatred much like his own face. Masks to let them believe they were someone else, to let them believe the two called Simon and Piggy never existed, and that their world was still fun, still games. He needed to go for a walk, now. He quietly stepped over the slumbering boys and headed towards the exit of their fort. When he reached the guards post he noticed it was empty, curiously he looked around; an empty guard post was never a good sign. Sighing in the decision to deal with it later he was about to continue on his was when he felt two arms lock around his waist. Startled he began to frantically struggle to be let free, but the arms held firm.

"Settle down Jack." Came a soft voice from behind that Jack instantly recognized. He stopped his struggling but remained rigid.

"Roger, what are you doing up?"

"I'm on guard." The reply was spoken with a slight well-duh quality to it. "I should be asking you why you're up." Roger released Jack and walked around to face the taller boy staring him in the eye. Jack returned Roger's gaze, a slight chill running through him. Roger wore the least paint; besides the two marks of blood Jack had placed there himself his face was almost bare. He knew it wasn't the oddity of an almost clean face that caused his almost fear like reaction, no, it was his eyes. Rogers's eyes were so cold and dead but deep in the center of his emotionless orbs a strong glint of anger burned along with a powerful possessiveness. But of what Jack could not tell. Jack knew that Roger had never convinced himself that Piggy and Simon had never existed like some of the other boys chose to believe. Roger knew he was the one responsible for Piggy's death alone, and he felt no remorse.

"I'm going for a walk."

Roger's eyes narrowed, "What about the beast? It's late."

Jack had half a mind to tell the boy he was more afraid of him then any beast but knew it would be unwise to do so. Roger was always his biggest supporter and follower. Also Jack had a suspicion that Roger would never lay a hand on him. "It won't attack me, we left an offering. Do you not have faith in your Chief?"

Roger looked like he wanted to stop Jack from leaving but decided against it not wanting to go against Jack's authority. "I worry about you…"

Jack snapped his head up at the sound of the gentle wavering voice coming from Roger's lips. Jack almost gasped when he met Roger's eyes to find a gentle look residing in them instead of their normal ferocity. His face looked like the innocence that his soul never held, cleanness devoid of hatred or savagery.

"Wa-what?"

"I said I worry about you. It's all I can do to keep you out of the danger you so like putting your self in." Roger's voice took on a peculiar tone, "But I promise you though, you will stay in power on this blasted island, even if in the end it's only me you're left ruling over."

Jack shivered at the determined and twisted words. 'Even if in the end it's only me you're left ruling over.' He felt his stomach clench, Roger was promising to kill anyone and everyone who opposed him. The intense eyes of the shorter boy filled him with an emotion akin to fear.

"I'm going for a walk," Jack re-stated somewhat uncertainly before turning to walk down the path out of the fort. Behind Jack's back Roger's eyes narrowed in slight annoyance and determination. Quickly he placed himself in front of the taller boy. Jack paused, a confused look flittering across his face at Roger's actions.

"Rog…"

Roger took Jack's confusion as an opening as he swiftly leaned up pressing his hands against the taller boy's chest and he sealed his lips against Jack's. Shocked, Jack's mind seemed to have shut down temporarily only to be refocused by the feeling of Roger's tongue sliding past his unresponsive lips to gently caress his own.

Jack snapped his head back forcefully breaking their contact. "Wha…why…but…" Jack stuttered his mind a jumble of random thoughts. Every time he would try to grab onto one of them it would be bashed away by another and so on until he was thoroughly confused. And overall it didn't help that they were still close enough to feel the others warm breath upon their lips or the fact that he could distinctly feel every finger of Roger's hands that were splayed across his chest. But the most distracting this was probably Roger's eyes; they held none of their usual rage or anger. Nor did they hold his common blank apathetic expression; there was just… openness.

Roger closed his eyes in defeat as he backed away from Jack. When Roger's eyes re-opened they once again held the all too common emptiness. Jack felt almost betrayed by the once again blank stare.

"I-I'm going for a walk." Jack didn't wait for a response before turning around and heading down the slope towards the beaches. Behind him Roger watched silently until Jack was gone.

"Please be safe." Was the whisper that floated into the unresponsive air before Roger fell to his knees, blank eyes staring at the empty spot where Jack had stood.

At the beaches Jack watched the waves continuous ebb and flow in silent wonder. The water that calmed him now was like their guard to the prison they were trapt on. Sighing he let himself fall back onto the sand, his body just out of reach of the ever-mocking waves. He closed his eyes in thought as he breathed in the salty air; he was so confused.

Why had Roger gone and kissed him, it wasn't right! He was supposed to grow up, get married, have kids, and get a great job. Sadly the thought of getting married and such held a flat and unrealistic tone like when a five year old tells its parents it's going to be an astronaut. 'But,' said a more spiteful part of his mind, 'You've never considered past this island since you got here, have you?' Jack frowned realizing he was mocking himself, and on this island anything to that nature was not a good sign. Unthinkingly Jack gently rose his hand to trace his lips were Roger had kissed him.

Groaning he rolled over onto his side glaring at the defenseless sand. He kept thinking about that blasted kiss! He couldn't get it out of his head. Sighing once again he wondered how he could have missed such affection from the shorter sadistic boy. He supposed it was because he was to busy trying to beat Ralph for whatever reason he had back then. Racking his brain he tried to remember any clues he had missed on Roger's affections.

'He was always with you,' his conscious piped up, 'Always at your side and doing as you told him to, even back at the choir.' Pausing to think about it the more obvious it became to Jack. Roger was always there, he was the first person to transfer to his tribe, and he always did what was requested of him. Jack frowned at the last thought, that wasn't right; Roger never listened to anyone but him.

What did it matter anyways? Jack pounded his fists into the sand cursing silently under his breath. Roger was crazy, he killed people, Roger was undeniably loyal to him, Roger was kind of cute when he smiled… stop! What the hell? He couldn't get that guy out of his head and that so-terribly-open look he had on his face after that kiss…

Disgruntled he looked up at the moon losing his thoughts in the silver light. A few minutes later he heard the light sound of footsteps drawing up behind him. Looking around quickly he inhaled a sharp breath when he saw Roger standing a few feet away looking down at him with an odd expression on his face.

"I was worried."

Jack merely nodded as Roger slowly came to sit beside him. They sat in uncomfortable silence for what seemed like hours to the two boys but only spanned for a few minutes. Jack's mind was racing, Roger had said it again; that he was worried about him. Jack had always known that Roger followed him but he secretly assumed that Roger cared for none but himself.

"Why did you kill Piggy?" Jack almost smacked himself. He had wanted to break the awkward silence but he hadn't even realized what he was saying until the words had already escaped his traitorous lips.

Roger looked over at him an eerie light glinting in his eyes. Slowly Roger crawled closer to Jack each move graceful and predatory like one of the majestic cats and Jack was his prey. Roger straddled Jack's legs and firmly pushed the other boy slowly onto his back. Catching Jack's eyes he began to speak on soft tones.

"Piggy? He was against you, he was challenging you."

"But to kill…" Roger removed on of his hands from Jack's chest and placed it over the boys' mouth, silencing him.

"You're my chief. I cannot let you be opposed by someone who will never see things your way."

Jack felt like he should be panicking. He was being held down by someone very willing to kill but he wasn't doing anything. Not fighting, not struggling, not commanding to be let up, he was doing nothing! Instead he was letting himself lay there under an obviously crazed boy. Jack's thoughts were pulled back to reality by a single splash of liquid falling on his face. Startled his attention was refocused to Roger, he was…crying?

"But no matter… no matter what I do for you, you ignore me! Why won't you care for all I've given you! Why!"

Jack raised his hands to the slightly panicked boys face. He could feel the tears slide over his fingers, tears that were so terrifyingly real. Roger never cried, not when they crashed here, not when he was hurt, never. But he was crying now, he was crying over him. Roger jumped back off of Jack an unreadable expression on his face.

"Don't touch me!" Roger's stressed voice rising steadily in pitch, "Don't touch me if you don't care!" Roger swung his leg as if to kick Jack but stopped a few inches away. Snarling he turned around and started running back to castle rock.

Jack sat, stunned at these new turns of events, and watched as the smaller boy ran off towards the encampment. Shivering Jack pulled his knees to his chest and whimpered softly. It felt so wrong seeing Roger cry, and it felt terrible having the boy mad at him.

Defeated he threw himself back at the sand. Being chief was easy, especially after being head of their choir, but this? This was annoyingly confusing. Roger was a beast, a merciless animal, Roger was… he was… the reason he could keep control. He was… his right hand man, his second on command, and the person who was always by his side, but, Roger wasn't here now. He had made Roger run, and Roger never ran. He was quiet, vicious, sneaky, speculative, proud, and he… worried?

A wind blew softly past causing a chill to run through him, but it didn't leave, it made him all the more aware that Roger wasn't at his side. Sighing Jack stood up to head back home. Roger scared him at times, though he would never admit it, and Roger did what one would call evil things. But… he needed him, though everything had changed, he needed him, and he would figure out everything else later.

He reached the fort pausing momentarily at the new guards, Sam n' Eric, before entering the inner sanctum. He spotted Roger near the back; his head buried against his knees. Jack walked up and sat beside him; Roger's eyes snapped open and stared curiously at Jack.

"I'm back." Jack murmured awkwardly

"I can see that…" Roger paused as if debating continuing, "I... I was worried."

Jack smiled lightly at the now slightly familiar line, "You worry too much."

"I'm sorry."

Jack raised his eyebrows curiously, "For worrying about me?"

"No, for… earlier…"

Jack grinned as he placed one hand behind Roger's head quickly bringing their lips together. Roger sat still in stunned silence before copying the taller boy's movements. This kiss was clumsy and inexperienced, but at the moment nether of the boys paid it any mind as they indulged their long denied and recently found passions.

Pulling back, both of them slightly out of breath, Jack stared amusedly into Roger's lost eyes. Placing another quick kiss on Roger's waiting lips he smirked at the violent boy. He had no clue what he was trying to achieve but he knew one thing, he couldn't have Roger away from him again. "Sleep."

Roger nodded contentedly as he laid down on the ground a small secret smile on his face. Jack laid down behind the smaller boy, wrapping an arm around Roger's waist and pulling the smaller boy closer.

"I worry."

"I know." Jack whispered, grinning faintly against Roger's shoulder.

"Ralph worries me."

Jack merely pulled Roger tighter against him. The sadistic boy was still inordinately fearsome, but no longer to him, though he supposed he never truly was. Roger was his… other half he supposed. Whatever, it truly didn't matter. Grinning he fell peacefully asleep.

Roger grinned almost maniacally. Jack was now his to protect, his to care for, his to watch over, his. 'You better run Ralph,' he thought, 'Jack's mine now, and come morning the hunt begins, because Ralph, you worry me.' Turning in Jack's embrace he placed a light kiss on the others lips before cuddling into his chest. He fell asleep smiling, dreaming of the wonderful reds of love and murder.

Finis

Fs: I hope you enjoyed. Please review.


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